30 years of living

With getting older, the first thing that comes to my mind is ANTI-AGING and it kind of bothers me. Aging both physically and mentally is a funny thing. Instead of dreading it I have decided to embrace it. I refuse to be the person chasing after her twenty year old self.  Yes, I am a sucker for creams that make our skin look beautiful BUT I refuse to edit out or act like I do not psychically age. I have wrinkles and little puffs under my eyes now. I have trouble staying up past 10PM. I have more scars on my body now then I did when I was younger. And you know what? Thats all ok.  I may be getting into my thirties with out a house, kids and husband under my belt but thats ok. Everyones journey is different. If someone is reading this post who may be down and out about “aging” I hope you find confidence in your journey and realize that success looks different on everyone. Do not compare yourself to others, your doing a great job.

When I look back and see what I have accomplished, experienced, and learned in thirty years, it made me proud. All the friendships I have made with beautiful people all around the world got me thinking, you know, 31 aint so bad. The most important thing I am proud of is that I really pushed myself to “LIVE”.  I know that if today were my last day here on this earth, I could leave it being content, which sadly, most people can’t relate too.

I have zero wasted time. Every tough time was a lesson. Every change was a blessing and every relationship I have in my life is cherished to infinity and beyond- Because at the end of our road, the only thing that matters is how hard you lived and how much you loved. I am so lucky to have so many special moments in my life its hard to count. But, I put together my top thirty “moments” in my life where I was changed in some sort of way. (in no particular order)

Cheers to my 31st year, and cheers to a few more laugh lines! I can’t wait to celebrate with my loved ones with lots of hugs and kisses and some cake too.  #grateful AND #aging

  1. Becoming Auntie CC: If you follow me on instagram you have probably noticed by now its mostly posts about my baby. This little love muffin has come into my life and rocked my world. The love I have for this little human is indescribable. My little princess  makes me smile and laugh everyday. I can still remember the first time Elle told me she loved me and said “Auntie CC”, Which was November 9th, 2016. (Still have the recording on my phone) I love love love you!  23379886_10214599850012893_5649369662475197271_n.jpg
  2. My first Gondola ride in Venice 11694036_10207297497138635_1693994927820440017_n.jpg
  3. My first sunrise in Bali. I could not believe that I actually had the courage to travel across the world to start my new beginning in life at 27 years old. The beauty was overwhelming. To this day I do not think I have ever experienced sunrises like these, and will always cherish the memories. I can still smell the smells of Bali waking up, and hearing the waves of the ocean from my bed. IMG_7245.jpg
  4. Completing my yoga teacher training program. This was one of the hardest things I have ever done in my life both physically and mentally. I look at this picture all the time to remind myself of this moment. This picture was taken at the end of my Bali journey. This picture shows a different person, with different perspectives. I fell in love with myself on this trip, gained confidence in myself that I literally can do ANYTHING I put my mind too, and learned the importance of forgiveness and letting go. So grateful for everything I have learned there and carry the knowledge I learned there with me everyday. (oh and that was my first beer in a month too so it tasted extra delicious!) IMG_8311.jpg
  5. Seeing “The Medicine Man”. Yes I totally had an “Eat Pray Love” moment! This man was insanely accurate and to this day things still happen that he said were going to! IMG_7567.jpg
  6. Being blessed and spiritually cleansed while visiting the Elephant Cave in Bali. The Elephant Cave is a sacred place dating back to the 11th century.  I can’t even describe how special this moment was. IMG_7779.jpg
  7. Holding a Koala in Australia. I specifically traveled to Brisbane since that is the only area you can actually hold one. How friggin cute is this little chub chub. He was heavier then expected! 12011185_10207673762145025_3933524761571571061_n
  8. My sunrise camel ride in the Outback in Uluru! 11998834_10207673793785816_7907976313071214470_n.jpg
  9. Experiencing a traditional BBQ in the outback. This photo was taken at sunset. (oh and thats the famous Uluru Rock behind me!) This night was full of magic. I tried authentic Australian BBQ food, even tasting kangaroo! A tribe performance took place under the stars. I will NEVER forget the stars. I have never seen so many stars so bright and so close. I remember wishing on a star to send me my love already. Fast forward a few more months after this trip-of-a-lifetime and I was granted my wish. Funny thing, Steve and I have a thing for stars and always take moments to look at the sky together when the stars are out. May sound corny I know, but dreams really do come true and I am a firm believer to this day on wishing on stars ❤ 12003011_10207673791025747_7811796380683273154_n
  10. Seeing the 12 Apostles on the “Great Ocean Road” road trip. This road trip will stay with me forever. Jenn if your reading this love ya and miss ya and will always remember our memories! 11205575_10207673810706239_5563078505679842081_n.jpg
  11. Bondi Baths: I will NEVER forget this moment. I remember taking a screen shot on instagram of the Bondi Icebergs pool thinking wow this would be amazing to see, but I will probably never get there. Well low and behold! Here I was!! Swimming like the mermaid I am in the Bondi Iceberg Pool. (and yes I cried when I stepped foot in it) 11150789_10207673827066648_893673832496948421_n.jpg
  12. This was the end of our “Great Ocean Road” road trip. My friend Jenn and I stayed at the cutest boutique hotel. We awoke at sunrise, ran across the street barefoot and jumped into the ocean. This picture will always be my favorite because the feeling I get when I remember that morning was so liberating. It is a moment I can’t really describe. It is a moment I felt so free. Its just a moment of a memory that moves me to this day. 11998911_10207673833306804_4178271864185747817_n
  13. My first trip to Italy! Not only was I proud of myself for doing the flight alone, I would up reconnecting with my friend Chrissy and we obviously have been BFFS since then 🙂 Italy is literally the most beautiful place I have ever seen. The people the food the culture, its just so special. I cried a lot (happy tears) my first trip and must say Italy still brings me tears to this day, its just that special! This was also my first “Trekking” adventure with Chrissy. We almost died on a glacier but getting to this view was worth it. 11742761_10207297463177786_2427549309481794058_n11755077_10207297509578946_7987126340863091004_n
  14. Falling in love with a little town called VV and Galletto<3 11753686_10207297423616797_5343841252077143628_n
  15. When my friend Chrissy surprised me and took me to THE vineyard to go to in Tuscany. It was my first vineyard experience and let me just tell you…NOTHING will top it. The first time I saw the rolling hills in Tuscany it literally took my breath away!11781634_10207297468817927_1873444842110060170_n.jpg
  16. Seeing Aushwetz in person. LITERALLY this was a moment. I have read, probably over 500 books regarding the Holocaust and have watched countless documentaries in all different languages. I never thought I would have the opportunity to not only visit the camp and have a private tour but visit the Warsaw Ghetto as well. This trip was truly a trip of a lifetime for me. And it was under 1000 dollars for EVERYTHING. #justsayin IMG_9711
  17. Moving to NYC with my BFF, a city people worldwide dream of visiting! This picture was on moving day! Loved my time living in the city but I also learned I need to live by the sea down the shore. Its truly where I am happiest ❤ 470699_4649911208714_833950391_o
  18. Visiting Casa di Giulietta in Verona Italy which was the home of Juliet and rubbing her boob for good luck in love. It worked! 11745583_10207297520939230_7599981838804451015_n.jpg
  19. Discovering this little medieval town when staying in Tuscany called San Gimignano. I was so so connected to this charming town, I know in a past life I lived there! Pictures do not do it justice but the beauty I saw is etched in my memory forever. They have amazing Gelato as well! 11148583_10207297457697649_1250951913432626319_n.jpg
  20. Our day spent together riding through Prosecco vineyards on Vespas. This was truly one of the best days of my life spent with the best people ever.12143328_10207815887458069_406567353085605804_n12107117_10207815882577947_858677986411224045_n
  21. My night in Venice by myself. So many magical things happened to me in that 24 hours thats a blog post in itself! This was the view from my room! Lets just say I was a super happy gal ❤12112265_10207815845577022_8779935476362107836_n.jpg12074979_10207815844576997_2681186902775927059_n12105785_10207815844977007_5487488485681450393_n
  22. The first time I visited the Amalfi Coast. No explanation needed! Oh and that was the view from our room. #unreal 12193479_10207994419961270_1942561029854334309_n.jpg12189172_10207994401720814_7334360008505495707_n.jpg
  23. Spain, this hike, this lunch, this town with these girls! One of my favorite funniest days! 1936284_10208319063037144_5238016220971237987_n
  24. The beach in Lagos Portugal and the time Chrissy surprised us with this adventure of ATVing through the cliffs of Portugal LOL and yes we had to sign out lives away. Oh the things Chrissy makes us do!14937312_10211102949752572_9166315864692312576_n14937201_10211103003713921_5787820170137401234_n.jpg
  25. South Africa. Everything about this trip was a moment. AND I can tell you one thing, I never in my wildest dreams have thought that I would go on a Safari in AFRICA. 17022503_10212208774717505_4946049538056830551_n
  26. Dancing the night away in a tiny town called Bari with my BBF Martine and her now hubby and his family. This was one of the best nights of my life, a dinner party with little english spoken full of amazing wine, food, company and dancing until the sun came up!12106911_10207815819736376_5298006770254381448_n.jpg
  27. My first New Years Eve spent with the love of my life and making wishes on lanterns ❤ 12439157_10208375815495920_7329145124430406140_n10623013_10208375825176162_1874208221374079539_n
  28. Floating in the sea in Italy with Steve. This trip in general was amazing between the watermelon dance, our new Italian friends and company. This was Steves first time to Italy and he got to see first hand why I am obsessed with it there. 22046132_10214243699749359_4081053532851837616_n21765070_10214243685589005_1934810647774323705_n21765077_10214243648348074_7513990811651027400_n
  29. My first ever trip out of the country by myself to Costa Rica to attend a yoga retreat hosted by Yoga Girl! It was the first time I have ever attempted to surf and I was beyond terrified! I was so proud of myself for getting half up on a wave, and being brave enough to be open to new experiences and accomplishing my first headstand! IMG_1997IMG_1959.jpg
  30. Teaching beach yoga at Lavallette boardwalk and mommy being one of my students.  Ever since I got my certification it was my DREAM to teach beach yoga on that boardwalk. There is something so special about that place to me. When I got the opportunity to do it I was beyond grateful. Im pretty sure I cried just a teeny bit during my first class. Thank you Regina for this experience! So looking forward to teaching again this year 🙂 IMG_123720245674_10213681739380701_7824755105323543316_n

 

XOXO

CC

Kissing my twenties goodbye 

As I’m approaching my 30th birthday I’m mixed with emotions. Where the f did the time go!? I was having a conversation with my older sister the other day on how I wasn’t sure I was ready to be 30, I’m not mature enough, and I feel like I should be turning 22. She said, ” I know, but think about the person you were at 22…your not the same girl”. As per usual, my brilliant sister is right (shocker). Not that I was a bad person at 22, I was just different. Lessons have not been learned and I was in a totally different space. At 22 my biggest problem was getting to work on time and where I was going out that night…Oh and what Chanel bag I was saving for.  My twenties have truly been a blast. I have had some of my best moments, many scary moments and tons of heartbreak with guys. It was all worth it because it made me who I am today, happy and healthy, both physically and mentally. If I could go back in time I wouldn’t change a thing, to me that means I did it right.

Things I would tell my younger self:

1. Your doing a great job at having fun. Keep it up because when you hit 28 your not going to be able to keep your eyes open past 11pm or have 10 Red Bull vodkas and be able to get out of bed the next day.

2. Your doing a fantastic job at never settling in life, whether it be with guys friendships or jobs. You know your worth and keep on trucking.

3. You will understand at a young age the importance of your health and that without it you have nothing. Never take it for granted and take care of yourself. Oh and where SPF!!!

4. Life is short eat the cookie.

5. You will thank all the boys who gave you heartache in your life, every tear you shed, every awful thing that came your way. All the bullshit you had to deal with from the stupid dating websites you were on, all the lies and all the creeps. All of these boys are not for you, that’s why they have to be so mean, because if they loved you back like you loved them, you would have never met Steve and you would have never had a chance to truly find yourself, alone, in Bali away from everything and everyone. Steve is going to come don’t worry and you will be happier then you thought you ever could be. It’s the real deal. He’s literally a real life prince who will make you feel adored every day and treat you like the princess you really are. He will arrive on a shiny boat called the Pinapple Express and cook you all these fabulous meals and make you laugh until you cry, not cry until you laugh. He will bring you pizza and wine and books and hand made cards, he will smell nice and take you to Christmas Tree Shop because he knows you love trinkets.  He will love you like he’s never loved before and it will show. His actions will match up with his words.

6. You will want kids one day because this little munchkin Elle is going to come into this world and flip your life upside down. People will tell you she’s your niece but she’s really connected to your soul and you feel as if she’s yours. You may even tell strangers when you two are out for your walks the first 6 months of her life that yea she’s yours… and that’s ok! You will feel a love and bond so tight, you will just want to be with her night and day. She comes first! You will be crazy auntie CC one day and it will be one of the most important roles of your life. You will doubt if you could ever love your own child like Elle, people say you will but You find it doubtful, but at least it will make you finally want kids of your own. We’ll see!

7. You will realize that your quality of life is more important then any BMW or Chanel bag. You will actually sell some of your collection to fit the bill for some of your travel adventures. This fashion career is not for you, sorry your just not one of them. Your not a quitter but quit this one sooner rather then later. Your going to have a career where you help people. You will finally feel fulfilled with the job you do, but only if you take the risk of leaving the one you hate and starting over. Your never to old to start over. You will realize that you want to live a life of passion. Work to live not live to work. Forget societies way of life and make your own rule book. Who says you need a job with benefits or a 401k or be married with kids at 30? Take your sweet time. Work hard and do what you have to do to pay your bills, be responsible and live your life. Never ever do something for money, do it for passion and you’ll see how happy you will be.

8. You will loose some friendships but that’s ok. Sometimes people grow apart but you will always honor all the good times you had with those people. Sometimes people are not meant to stay in your life forever, sometimes they are just meant to get you though moments. You will though remain friends with most, and these people will be so good to you and you guys will always have the best times ever. You will support each other through thick and thin and embrace changes in life together.

9. It’s ok to be super attached to your family and want to live with mom forever. If anyone judges you they are just jealous your moms the coolest! 😉

10. Your truly going to learn so much about yourself and what you can do. In the beginning of your twenties you were full of the phrases “oh I could never do that” but by the end of your twenties your going to be saying “well if I survived the bugs in Bali I can do anything in life.” Your going to travel all over the world and majorly push yourself too your limits and set new limits and overcome fear over and over again. Your going to embrace the challenge of life and appreciate it’s beauty. Your going to have friends from all over the world and have experiences most will never get to experience in their lifetime.

Lastly, don’t worry hunny bunny, life is gonna be gravy. Every time you think you are being rejected from something good you are just being redirected to something better. To everything I have ever lost…thank you for setting me free.

XOXO

CC